Up until last week, I thought only boys could break your heart. Little did I know that friendships, hobbies, and careers can also factor in to the awful, pit-in-your-stomach, empty feeling that heartbreak does to a person. I guess I was naive to all of this as I am luckily not often on the receiving end. Last week while scrolling through Twitter, I came across a tweet that has helped me to accept my feelings and try to move forward. It read, “Negative things happen to all of us. We can’t get away from them, but don’t let them affect everything about you”.
When in a relationship with someone you care deeply for, you invest your all. When you have an amazing friend, you put the effort in to make time for one another. When training for your next big race, you plan out the perfect training program to bring you to the finish line as fast as possible. When you are passionate about your career, you never stop learning and continuing to grow in your field. Blood, sweat, and tears go into it, and when we see our successes, it only propels us to continue on the path to reach higher and higher. I am extremely lucky to have not had too many major hardships to overcome thus far, but don’t be fooled, a lot of hard work and dedication has allowed me to be in the position that I am in today.
I have had breakups, diminished friendships, and a loss in the CIS Field Hockey Championship Gold Medal game (that I am still not over almost 3 years later!), but my career has always been something that I truly feel that I have and continue to excel in. It has been a constant, regardless of everything else going on in my life. My passion for fitness, health, and wellness is truly genuine and I wake up excited for each new day ahead. I have earned a Bachelor of Kinesiology from the University of Toronto and continue to expand into a variety of fitness modalities with each new course I take. I have invested a lot, not only to see myself succeed, but to create a community of amazing clients that I have the privilege of guiding to achieve their own successes.
Last week, I was told that an opportunity in which I felt well deserving of was no longer available to me. I felt like someone took my breath away upon hearing the news. It has been so extremely difficult to accept that I haven’t even told many of my close friends. As I write this, I feel like a failure. Although I know I have only done my best, it is difficult to accept that in someone else’s eyes, they feel that it isn’t enough. Regardless of politics and circumstances, being rejected in whatever the context is, is a terrible feeling. I think I am awesome (as we all should feel about ourselves, because if not, who will?), but it was definitely a blow to my ego.
After feeling sorry for myself and coming across the tweet mentioned above I had to put things into perspective. This one minor setback or disappointment is only adding fuel to my fire to do more. I am healthy and happy and have a heck of a lot to be proud of. I have hesitated sharing this as I am certainly not looking for sympathy, but I hope I can offer a connection to others who have experienced heartbreak in its various forms. The one thing that has the capability to break our heart offers us a learning experience and it only means it is something we are passionate about. It should never define us but only add to our story.
It’s a good reminder that life has its ups and downs so ride the wave when things are going great. Regardless of how our lives actually are, or are perceived to be, everyone experiences negativity at points in their life. It is how we roll with the punches that shows who we really are and what we are made of. And…stay tuned because I have some exciting things coming up…like an outdoor bootcamp downtown Toronto starting in July!
Be fierce. Be strong. Be vibrant.
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