What does self-love really mean?

Happy New Year everyone! I am back and ready to hustle after taking a much needed break over the holidays.  I wish you all nothing but the best for the year ahead and hope that you accomplish all that you set your sights on!

I have been brainstorming a lot of new things to post about on social media or blog about here and came to the realization that we throw a lot of words around that are beginning to not be as meaningful or as powerful as we once anticipated them to be.  How many times have you heard people discuss mindfulness, gratitude, or self-love? These are words or notions we spew out on social media and get a bunch of likes for, but it had me thinking; do we know how to achieve any of it?  It almost seems trendy now to post on social media platforms about loving ourselves that I honestly think we are beginning to post for the instant gratification of talking the talk than for actually walking the walk and actively practicing it.  I have made my fair share of posts revolving around this topic that I wanted to make sure we all know how to actually achieve it!

Take a moment now.  Do you truly understand what these terms mean? I quickly Googled them so that we all have a reference point from here on out:

Gratitude-“the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness”
Mindfulness-“a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique”
Self-love-“regard for one's own well-being and happiness” 

I am finding more and more that we are simply just throwing these words around as opposed to actually practicing to achieve them.  This is similar to someone saying they will exercise, get fit, be strong, or lose weight.  We can say it all we want but unless you actually implement best practices to get there, they will simply be words and nothing more.

Below I have put together a small list of how I have been working on achieving self-love in my own life.  I feel that gratitude and mindfulness are words that are often paired with self-love and they can also be achieved when we put our words into action.  I hope that this short list can help you on your journey to actually experiencing self-love at its finest.

  1. Say no.  We are by nature, people pleasers.  Saying yes to everything, saying no to nothing.  It is okay to say no and turn something or someone down.  When we are stretched too thin, we can end up resenting what we are doing and not enjoy the moments.
  2. Do one thing a day for you.  Especially as parents or caregivers, we have the tendency to wake up and immediately look for something to help someone else.  Whether it is cook, provide a ride, or do laundry, we fall into the trap of going through an entire day without actually doing a single thing for ourselves.  Stop. Take a moment. Give yourself even just a few moments in a day to do what you truly love.  Maybe it is a bath, reading a book, going for a walk.  Whatever it may be, go to bed each night feeling like you have not only given to others, but filled your own cup too.
  3. Be in the moment.  Experience things.  Not 'for the ‘gram’, not for a tweet, not for the likes.  Love the people you are with.  Surround yourself with those who lift you higher and treat you with respect.  It is at that moment where you can find peace within yourself and be proud.

This list of three is simply just a start.  Self-love means different things for different people.  My goal was to get your mind thinking and realizing that actions speak louder than words.  We can say “let’s be great”, but let’s now take the next step and actually do it!

Be fierce.  Be strong.  Be vibrant.


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